SEE YOU! A brand spanking new modern fitba thread 2021/22

I hope Rudiger is involved in some sort of an industrial accident soon.. One involving steam and a gigantic hydraulic press. Maybe some compressed air too.

 

Weakest penalty decision of are times

 

Oh wow Fred with the good chip That was fucking terrible

Two best chances Ushited had they gave United the ball.

Its hard to overstate just what a team of shite hawks Chelsea really are

Scott Tominay MOTM that's how you know it's been a real dogs-of-war shit fest..
Ronaldo booked for dissent. His mother should have dissented

 

Shocking decision. United offside. Clearly. Ronaldo forced wide ball into touch off Chelsea player. United get corner whereas had Ronaldo scored directly the goal would have been chalked off and Chelsea get the free kick.

Instead the corner is given. That makes no sense at all.

Rudiger with the late howler. Twat.

All over 1-1. It better not feature first on MOTD cos it shouldn't. Too low quality.

 

Love to get Feebles opinion on this...

 

Real Madrid hosting Sevilla next.

Really hope Sevilla win this one. But it’s gonna be difficult.

 

1-0 Sevilla

 

1-1. Goal keeper error and Benzema took advantage.

 

Not the first time in his life that scumbag took advantage.

 

Vini Jr with the game winner for Real.

 

Real now 5 points clear at the top of the table.

 

Usual nonsense. The fat sweaty mess (not the one who looks like a clown. The other one) claimed that the clown tried to put him off by taking a long time to throw a dart. He then claimed that he found a squeaky floorboard and was bouncing up and down on it to put him off. Grown men FFS. Anyway, the fat sweaty one has previous for being a dickhead. Off the top of my head, he's had verbal or physical altercations with eight other players.

Basically, this is what happens when you get chavs playing bar games for big money and they are full of drink in the middle of the afternoon.

MTF

 

I wonder if being fat is an actual advantage in darts? Maybe the ballast helps with stability

 

I thought there might be some profound darts-based explanation.

Instead it's :-

*alcohol
*low social status
*money

 

I think the advantage is reverse-advantage.

You get fat drinking Porter and hanging around with your mates, in the vicinity of whom a dartboard resides. After mucho boozo, verbals fly and as in some medieval joust, glasses are drained and challenges thrown down.

Eventually, in extreme cases, such arguments are settled in the age-old contest known as TRIAL BY STEEL.

The darts are thus brought out from behind the bar.

Its not like you show proficiency at darts in your dormer at Eton and they say "get him down the boozer, fire the lager into him, we've got a winner here"

 

Ooooooone hundred and eeeeeighhhhhty

One thing I'll give them credit for is the ability to do their bit of maths on the fly.

Its like London can drivers have been demonstrated to have an over developed hippocampus.

Brain changes seen in cabbies who take 'The Knowledge'

Guys who couldn't pay attention in school for 10 seconds suddenly making split second decisions like a shortest viable route or the best way to zero from 117 with 4 darts.

It demonstrates the pronounced limitations of modern secondary education. All of these guys was "fick" but they can count backwards faster or navigate quicker than a RAF pilot.

 

I hate Real. Should have put a tenner on them to win.

 

Fucking great for mental arithmetic is darts. Never ceases to amaze me when young lads are at the board and they are using a fucking app to work out their scores. All the old timers like me just aggressively tutting at them.

MTF

 

Nah. The current world champion is a steroid-fuelled gym rat who used to play professional rugby league.

Darts players are fat simply because almost every game and tournament is played in a pub.

MTF

 

My arithmetic holds up to darts & beer ok but on saturday night somebody challenged me to recite the alphabet backwards? He said its a field test for drunk drivers in the states. Thatd land me in the drunk tank, f'n hard

 

In before Slice

 

Crimbo Trivia:

When Shane McGowan is being dragged into the " drunk tank" in the video for "fairytale of new york", as per the lyrics,...
What actor plays the part of the Cop taking him down to the drunk tank???

 

Man, I could tell you what school Shane Mcgowan went to, the mental institute he was in, the fanzine he wrote as a teen, his birthday, what vinyl record he was eating when the band decided to fire him, his mum's favourite song. Not that these things interest me but over the last 20 years my best mate has talked about him more than his family, love interests & job combined. Not even a joke. Matt Dillon.

 

Yep I was going to put a tenner on QPR at 1-0 and at 1-1 with minutes left.

Like a cunt, I didn't

 

You gotta admit bud, that is some fucking way to win a match!

YOU RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR'ssssssssssssssssssssss

 

I've no beef with Messi, he's one of the best to ever kick a ball, but this Ballon d'Or shit is getting silly now. It was clearly between Salah and Lewandowski for me.

 

https://twitter.com/BhoysAnalytics/status/1465073210031026181?s=20

 

Watch Palmeiras player's 'ridiculous' dive after being 'pushed' by referee

 

A big group of old geordie birds got on the train at 9.30 and cracked open the bevie.....they're currently arguing about which of them qualifies as 'proper geordie' and one old lass sounds like brian Johnson with throat cancer & a bad cold. Fucking love a train journey, i do