Brand new modern fitba 2018-19 thread!! SEE YOU!!

World porridge day, taeday - gerrit doon Ye.

 

Legit every time I click on the bbc front page there seems to be a different story about women's fitbaw. If you ask me the next big equality challenge is why the boys under 12s game doesn't receive as much attention as the men's game, clearly entrenched ageism at play

 

BBC Propaganda.

Womens football is basically The SS meets School Sports Day............"You WILL Cheer and you WILL Clap"

Eh, no, fuck off.

 

"There's less money in Womens football, it is discriminatory"

Yes, that's right. I discriminate. I have the fight of free association.

THe story I saw on the BBC today was about this "BIg Transfer" where some chick was moving from Man City Ladies or something to Barcelona.

Proper fitbaw story ay. Right up there with Coutinho to Barcelona for £130m.

I mean, when you have Edwina Currie on Question Time lecturing people on the "excitement" of Womens Football....sure....a woman whose idea of danger was to have an affair with John fucking Major.

 

At least afterwards nobody has to be told to "gerrit oot ye".

It will come out. Of its own volition. Mark my turds.

3 bowls of oatmeal is a guaranteed 6 shits a day. You lose weight as much by dehydration as by healthy eating.

You can't cheat on a diet if you include porridge. Not unless you've got a larder in your bathroom.

 

L EYE VEE
EEE ARR PEEE
DOUBLE O ELL
LIVERPOOL FC

 

Is this what it would be like on a daily basis if you lived with Hut?

 

I don't think it's a new "trend" but perhaps something I've just been more aware of recently is goalkeepers screaming at their defenders every time they have to do anything other than make the simplest of stops. Quite annoying. Plenty of times it's warranted, but plenty of others it comes across as them being put off because they had to actually do what they're there for.

How dare you not be absolutely perfect and allow an opposing player to shoot the ball when there's a chance of it getting past me! GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!

 

They need to realise not every defender is Clint Hill. There are levels to this shit.

 

In "The Game" (by several light years the greatest book about sport ever written by an athlete), Ken Dryden talked about the manner in which a goaltender (as they are called in hockey) might react when a goal is scored and how calculated it really is; to the point where it is a strategy in and of itself... he speaks about how he tried to look straight ahead, calm as if to convince the crowd and his teammates that he was unperturbed by the event; he would definitely stop the next one... but at times, he couldn't maintain the ruse, cursing himself, slamming his stick on the ice in frustration, violently sweeping the puck from the back of the net... he talks of other goalies who would gesture wildly and accusingly at the nearest defenseman etc

I liked his take on Gerry Cheevers, then of The Boston Bruins who "would adopt a posture and manner so cocky and self-assured after allowing a goal that he would cause the crowd and even the players to second-guess what they had just seen with their own eyes"

 

This the kind of thing I'm talking about. I know it's not something new but for whatever reason I'm noticing it quite a lot.

I think it's more understandable for hockey goalkeepers. Over the course of game they will be called on much more frequently than their football counterparts. That's even if they have the most elite defense in the world in front of them.

 

Hockey goalies are roughly 10 times more important to their teams than football keepers ... I say that now as a well-informed viewer who's watched loads of both sports

Any football guy that's never watched hockey who argues against that doesn't know what he's talking about

Brazil won world cups with keepers who couldn't catch a cold ... I've yet to see the football equivalent of Bernie Parent with the Flyers or Hasek with Buffalo

A good keeper is nice to have and it's obviously an important position but in hockey a great goalie can win you championships you're not supposed to win

 

Exactly. Goals are obviously harder to come by in football and sometimes one big save can be the difference between winning and going home, but a team is never going to be a contender on the strength of their goalkeeping alone. They are an important part to be sure, but more of an extra piece that can tip the margins.

 

Exactly

 

I was strolling thru st Vincent place on my way home last night and a group of wee 16 year old bams start egging a taxi. Nothing to see here, stroll on. Except, once the taxi driver's gotten back in his cab, the fleeing boys get brave and come back for a second go, this time with me in the fucking friendly fire. It misses all my new overpriced cos gear thank fuck and hits my £5 nylon shoulder bag. Anyway, red mist descends and I'm now the taxi drivers honers, sprinting in front of traffic, ready to serve time to heroically batter a bunch of small children. Ffs. Traffic slows me up and the biggest one stops to get brave: 'mon then ya prick what you gonna do?!' At which point I have a wee moment of clarity and realise : here, good fucking question! What a walloper I am.

 

I think with the goaly thing a lot of its just a release of adrenaline....they can't jump up and down and celebrate the way a scorer can but it's gotta come out somehow.

 

Unless Ye were carrying a few cartons o’ eggs yersen and handed some tae the taxi drivers tae return fire, an unwinnable situation, like. Mibee always carry aroond a packet o’ floour in case o’ NED emergencies.

 

I would've kidnapped one of them and tortured him by cracking eggs on his face and making him eat them until he died

Then I'd pull out his eyes and replace them with eggs in the sockets.

After that, I use his phone to text the two wee pricks who got awee and I tell them to meet me (him) at whatever location. I strap dynamite to the body with a remote detonator. Sit the dead fuck on a bench... wait until the two wee cunts get close enough to see the eggs where the eyes should've been and hit the button.

 

Damn it, I didn't think of that

 

Hopefully a bit of revenge for Ireland tonight against the Danes.

 

No revenge but a semi competent performance.

 

Ireland played competently in the first leg against Denmark in the World Cup qualifiers, then had a perfect start in the return leg, and then somehow after that they completely shat the fucking bed. That 1-5 was a bit of an anomaly really, just happened at the worst possible time. Ireland aren't very good, but Denmark aren't any great shakes either. Just a collective Irish brainfart and Eriksen playing an absolute blinder.

 

"THis Proves Raheem is the Man"- Ian Wright.

 

LOL wait what the fuck?! We're winning???

 

Holy shit man. 3-0?! You know what, am in a non-football pub right now doing some writing, if it's still 0-3 with 20 minutes to go I'm gonna go watch it.

 

I backed England to win in my ACCY and with good reason- they play well when there is nothing at stake and Spain are an average, transitioning side.

 

Spain aren't average, they're good. Still, am expecting England to fuck this up.

 

Surprised by the goalscorers, Sterling is dog shit and Rashford has been poor lately. Were they good goals?

 

Watching the game now. This England side is pretty average bar a couple of world class players, but MATE, when we bring in some of those youth players like Foden and Brewster we are going to be shit hot.

 

Offense wins fans. Defense wins games. Liverpools offense this year has been blunted but they are joint top.

Same with England.

Until England learn how to properly defend, see out games, and not rely on athleticism as an replacement for tactical nous, then they will be prone to calamity at various stages of tournaments,

Let's bear in mind that Englands recent record in comp football as it stands, right now, is W W L D W L L