I think This is where it started

Dude don't get me started on that fuken body wash. It was supposed to be complete months ago. We have spoken with several chemist and they can't even figure it. The only way we can get it to work correctly is if we add things that aren't natural which we may have to do.

If you take lil guy out you don't have to worry about a big dinner bill. All you have to do is take him to McDonalds and order him a happy meal and he'll be good to go. We will hook sooner rather then later. I'll Holla 5000

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'> Skelo

Dude you couldn't come to my house. We have a rule if you can't reach the door bell and you are a full grown man you can't enter the crib. By the way what's the lesson for tomorrow. How to conquer your fears of being a short dude. How to get the best prices at the baby gap. How to answer orders at pizza hut. Which is it? By the way isn't school out for the summer? I'll Holla 5000 [/b][/quote]
Now hazzbeen wants me to come to his "crib."

I will not buy soap OR a blowjob from you, hazzbeen. You'll have to try elsewhere.

Any success selling the Hazzbeen Biography to a movie studio yet? They'd probably just think it was a ripoff of the movie Radio.

 

All I would need to do is stuff your lil body inside a pizza box and sling your ass across the desert. Better yet I'll stuff your lil ass inside my back pocket. I'll Holla 5000

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'> Dude don't get me started on that fuken body wash. It was supposed to be complete months ago. We have spoken with several chemist and they can't even figure it. The only way we can get it to work correctly is if we add things that aren't natural which we may have to do.

If you take lil guy out you don't have to worry about a big dinner bill. All you have to do is take him to McDonalds and order him a happy meal and he'll be good to go. We will hook sooner rather then later. I'll Holla 5000 [/b][/quote]
Translation of Hazzbeen's posting:
Nobody will let me leech off of their product, so Sparkebar can't release their bodywash yet. I am taking the bus because my near-useless sidekick, runtrunt, choked on his Sparkebar while driving the Sparkemobile. I am trying to engineer the bodywash, but how can I do it when I've never studied chemistry.

 

How in the hell are you call someone a runt. Knowing damn well your damn runt yourself. Hey when is the next Willy Wonka movie coming out? Shouldn't you be up in the North Pole? Hey tell Santa I said hi. You lil Keebler Elf. I'll Holla 5000

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'> All I would need to do is stuff your lil body inside a pizza box and sling your ass across the desert. Better yet I'll stuff your lil ass inside my back pocket. I'll Holla 5000 [/b][/quote]
Yes, we know your history of sports performance. You would chip a nail while trying to open a pizzabox and be on the disabled roster for a few weeks. That's why the closest you got to an NFL career is selling hotdogs and pennants...until you twisted your ankle.

 

Roald Dahl was a brilliant writer

 

Once again lil guy we do not sell our product to pregnant women and children. Or guys that aren't full grown. I'll Holla 5000

 

you are both pussies

no talk about fighting to the death huh?

 

Do I need to post my pictures of me caring the rock in game situation. Do I? Man I think I will. It's time for cats to see big dawg in action once again. Dude just admit it you really wish you were me. Maybe not the NFL thing but just full grown like me. I'll Holla 5000

 

Smashin

Have you ever seen a what a Rotweiler would do to a yorkie? Me neither, but I promise you it wouldn't be pretty. I'll Holla 5000

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'> How in the hell are you call someone a runt. Knowing damn well your damn runt yourself. Hey when is the next Willy Wonka movie coming out? Shouldn't you be up in the North Pole? Hey tell Santa I said hi. You lil Keebler Elf. I'll Holla 5000 [/b][/quote]
Jesus. I pimpslapped hazzbeen so hard that he thinks I'm a movie producer. I better lower the intensity on my pimphand.

hazzbeen:
How much soap did you sell today? Did the free blowjob you gave with every bar aggravate any lingering NFL injuries? Like the protruding anus and gimpy legs you have from trying to sell Sparkebar in the showers?

:5000:

 

I better lay off Captain Parole Officer, or he might shoot another poodle after it pisses on his soap.

 

Lil Guy I don't have shit against gay people but damn are you trying to hit on me? I mean you keep bringing up gay shit dawg. I'll Holla 5000

 

Hey lil guy that's Mr. Probation Officer. We don't have a parole system here in Wash. State. I'll Holla 5000

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'> Lil Guy I don't have shit against gay people but damn are you trying to hit on me? I mean you keep bringing up gay shit dawg. I'll Holla 5000 [/b][/quote]
Of course I mention gay shit. It's how you make a living....wiping transvestites asses with Sparkebars as part of your scientific approach to your job. Don't blame me...it's your "research".

 

Not only do you have issues with your height but damn dawg you seem to be having issues with your gayness. No matter how hard you try I'm not gonna participate in any midget sex. Now I've done some freaky shit in my life but none that consist of gay midget pizza delivery boys. Keep that shit to yourself. I'll Holla 5000

 

I can see it now. Captain Parole Officer is going door to door, begging his parolees to buy his soap. "It'll look good on your rap sheet," he says hopefully. After 10 minutes of non-stop laughter, his patience runs out and he tries to pepperspray the poodle. BIG MISTAKE! Fifi barks twice and pisses on his sample case. It's time for the frustrated and humiliated former NFL towelboy to make a stand.

"BUY THE SOAP OR I SHOOT FIFI," he shrieks desperately.

No sale. "I won't buy that foul-smelling shit," says Parolee Billy-Bob, "Don't you have to have a business license?"

BLAM!!!!

 

lil guy you must be getting tired cause that shit was whack. Try again lil guy. I'll Holla 5000

 

Now, as hazzbeen's defense are beaten down, he starts to just get angry. Turn that frown upside-down, hazzbeen. I might buy a bar of soap off of you, but you have say please.

 

How many times do I have to tell you. You have to be full-grown man to use the product. I can not sell it to midgets. I'll Holla 5000

 

You are right about one thing though. I'm getting tired of kicking your ass. My foot's falling asleep!

 

OK I see that you are having issues not knowing if you are a full-grown man or not. I will try and break it down for you slowly. If you are in your 20's or 30's and you still shop at the baby gap, the lil folkes shop, or in the junior section you are not a full grown man. If you can't drive a car because you can't reach the pedals you are not a full grown man. As a matter of fact If you have to ride in a car seat you are not full grown man. If you go to the amusement park and you can't ride the roller coaster because you are too short then you are not a full grown man. If you have to tread water in 3ft you are not a full grown man. If 2 y/o's look you eye to eye then dammit your ass ain't full grown. Sorry dude can't sell you the soap. Maybe if you grow a couple of feet then maybe I'll hook you up. I'll Holla 5000

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'> This thread is running on fumes. Lets see how far past E we can go. [/b][/quote]
recycled joke after recycled joke

buddy is looking for his lost youth in a diss battle, give the man his time

 

this thread should be closed.

And the quebecer hating midget should be banned for being so fucking lame and unfunny.

Gee, I've seen funeral funnier than him

 

Lil guy your lil foot is falling asleep because it's dangling and you can't touch the ground when you sit in regular size chairs. What you need to get is a lil chair which will hold your lil body so that your lil feet can tough the ground while you use your lil fingers to press on your lil key board while you are looking at your lil monitor with your lil itty bitty eyes. Oh yeah 1 more reason to detemine if you are a full grown man. If your clothes sizes are 3T dawg you ain't full grown. My product is for full grown people only. I'll Holla 5000

 

Can someone please tell me how to post pictures. FUK! Lil guy can you help me. I'll Holla 5000

 

This post did not help you in your battle here. :huh:

 

Alright, I want to know who took my editing abilities away. This is the most popular thread so someone should see this.

I want answers damnit!