The 2015-16 World Fitba Thread!

Last Thursday week we went out for a work Colleagues leaving do. I got shit-faced and got into bed at 2AM with some of Morleys chicken. Woke up next day, bones and all in the bed.

The Red Wine I had....man...I was doing huge fibrous elephant pats for three days. It must have been the wine, because that bit of Chicken couldn't produce that much poo.

 

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Iranian Fitbaw Female Ninjas...

 

Lovely.

 

::

 

You just know the Chuckle Brothers are going to get busted on some kiddy rape beef dating back to the late 40's

 

Billeh...this guy has it in for you.

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What is wrong with people?

 

Check out his bedroom wall literature!!

 

Aye, Jimmy's a diamond.

Hoo much o' Keane's autobiography have Ye read, so far? Ah'm honestly thinking o' buying the book as it has been pretty spicy in the wee bits Ah've read as o' yet. Wi' regards tae his anger, he may well be being honest but he certainly diznae like the same degree o' honesty being levelled at him, like. Take the two prood Scotsmen who put him well and truly in his box, Fergie and wee Gordon Strachan, fer example. He alsae admits tae suffering from terrible, uncontrollable rages.

Ye said once something Ah foond profoond aboot Nigel Benn, when responding tae some gadge who'd pipe up wi' hoo they respected Benn's 'honesty'... Ye suggested that he didnae have the wit tae be able tae be anything other than honest as he has zero social skills. Do Ye recall that? Noo, whit aboot Keane? He is a dangerous bassa - like the Irish 'Begbie'.

Ah alsae watched that 'Creatine' bufty... whit a numpty! Ah once used creatine, makes Ye strong and Ah put on a stone in weight but had a heid like hot air balloon. Ah alsae believe it diznae dae yer liver any good (Ah ken it's no' steroids, just ma unscientific opinion).

 

I've never read a footballers autobiography but im pretty tempted to with Keane. He's such a ridiculous person it seems to be chock full of gems. Like being furious when he showed up at training at ipswich and the kits were blue but not being able to tell anyone why. 'City are blue, Rangers are blue - they must've known i hated blue!'. Or wanting to quit Celtic on his first day when he got on the coach and saw Hartson eating crisps. All the talk about players cock sizes. And knowing things would go wrong at Sunderland during his first week when a member of the backroom staff put ABBA on before the game and nobody in the dressing room had the guts to switch it off ::

 

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Ah didnae SEE the bit aboot him being a willy watcher - it'll be a Fightbeat best seller.

Whenever Ah watch Keane on the telly, Ah half expect him tae poke Adrian Chiles' eyes oot, fer some reason.

 

Yeah apparently Nicky Butt has the biggest he ever saw. Gary 'Bizzzzy' Neville the smallest:mut:

 

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Keane is the last one Ah'd ever believe wid compare 'lads' in the shoower.

 

Look at the traffic in here noo bare knobs have been mentioned... dinnae be shy, laddies! LMFKO!

SEE YOU!

 

Imagine having to shower with your workmates every day at 5pm? :: Being a footballer is an odd gig.

 

:bears::bears:

 

I just pumped "Nicky Butt Massive Penis" into Google and "[h=3]Big Ass Showdown: Nicki Minaj vs. Kim Kardashian ..." is what came up first in the results.[/h]

 

I knew a gay ginger guy who would get his kit off at eccie parties and windmill his big cock at you. If somebody dozed off they'd wake up with him T-bagging them.

 

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Vhisky wid probably welcome such an awakening... 'Red Rose' is Canada's favourite tea brand.

 

The guy had a bit of thing for me for a time. He chased me around subclub one night saying he was gonna 'destroy my ass'.

 

Aye, well there's a lesson tae be learnt there, laddie - beware o' big ginger cocks!

 

:scared:

 

It's just so pretty... What a fucking goal... Socrates lets the ball go through his legs, he knows Eder is charging in... Eder lifts it on one foot to get under it and then fucking blasts it... Keeper never saw it... A PROPER goal

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If that same goal was scored against England the pundits would call it "poor defending".

 

:giggle:

It's crazy that in the same exact match, Socrates scored this beauty:
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Eder's goal, which was practically a training ground trick shot, was the winning strike in a crucial match that was level at 1-1... That is badass.

 

Man, that was some beautiful fitbaw.